CALL ME OUT 2020 EDITION

[blitzbrained]

ACTUALLY MADE AT THE START OF THE YEAR THIS TIME

1. check out my muselist (or dont)
2. pop a character on here u want me to tag
3. optional: pick someone you want tagging with
4. PROFIT

Comments

hi ekkehardt

[accidentallich]

do you remember when i told you about my ex-lover

the one who turned me into a lich

this is somewhat time-critical

[spelleton]

lock yourself in your room until i get there

[ CONCERN. ]

[accidentallich]

i didnt even tell you he was outside?

but okay

[Added about a minute later:]

hes not trying to break in, he just keeps trying to convince me to let him in

[spelleton]

you wouldn't be texting me if he wasn't outside and you didn't want him to be

i felt it was a good guess

[ It's too bad his powers as a lich don't cover teleportation. Just healing. He's fine with healing, but rapid transport would be nice right now. ]

[accidentallich]

you're right

it's too bad there's no way he'll believe that i'm not home right now

i don't think he's going away

[spelleton]

I can probably get him to leave.

[ By diplomacy or by force. He's capable of both.

Where is this guy anyway, he's where Gershom lives now. ]

[accidentallich]

[Asshole ex is not hard to locate: he's the guy outside Gershom's apartment door who radiates Big Douchebag Energy. He's not paying attention to Ekkehardt or anyone else in that apartment block.]

Kuni, my Kuni, won't you please open up? It's very frustrating, talking to a door. And I haven't seen your beautiful face in so long...

[spelleton]

Nobody by that name lives here. [ Which is technically true; he assumes the name this person is crooning through the door is an identity Gershom has long since shed, and thus, not relevant to who he is now. ]

Are you sure you have the right address?

[accidentallich]

[That does get Salvador's attention. He gives Ekkehardt a once-over, but doesn't recognize Ekkehardt - so obviously Ekkehardt's no one worth knowing.]

Positive. [He paid good money to track him down.] Are you friendly with the man living here?

[spelleton]

I know of him. [ Better to be closemouthed and evasive. At the very least, it'll get his attention off creepily hanging around Gershom's door. ] But I don't see how that's relevant to the conversation.

[accidentallich]

It's very relevant. [Because you know his Kuni, who isn't letting him inside to sweep him off his feet.] You see, my Kuni - whatever he's going by now - and I have had a tiny lover's quarrel. It'd be easier to talk these things out if he would answer the door...

[He does look genuinely sad, despite the fact that 'a tiny lover's quarrel' is absolutely not an accurate description of what is happening.]

[spelleton]

You're not much of a lover if you never bothered to learn his name, I'll say that much. You'll forgive me if I don't believe you, I hope.

[ He folds his arms, a frown on his face. ]

You really don't have any business here. Please leave.

[accidentallich]

No.

[I hope Ekkehardt didn't expect him to be convinced that easily. Salvador narrows his eyes at him.]

What business do you have, shooing people away from my gazelle's door?

[spelleton]

[ He didn't, but he'd rather not have to break the man's skull or something equally unpleasant within Gershom's hearing range. ]

I don't like people who force themselves on others. Isn't that enough?

[accidentallich]

Force? No, you have the wrong impression entirely. I just want to talk things out with my Kuni, that's all.

[It goes without saying that he won't accept 'no' for an end to that talk.]

[spelleton]

I don't think I have the wrong impression, actually.

I'm asking you politely. Leave or I'll remove you.

[accidentallich]

[Salvador gives Ekkehardt a clear once-over, then scoffs.] No. I won't leave without my lover with me.

[...this is, of course, when Ekkehardt gets a text.]

he can have a bit of a temper
and i dont want him to hurt you
maybe i should just let him in

[spelleton]

Keep the door closed.
I'll be fine.

Well. I'm giving you one more chance to leave quietly. For his sake, not yours. [ He pulls off his gloves, from red to black. These ones are more hard-wearing. ] If you refuse to go, then I'll just have to convince you.

[accidentallich]

if youre sure
please dont get hurt just for me

[He's not worth it, he thinks.]

If you insist on getting between me and my love, then I'll have to remove you myself.

[Salvador considers his magical prowess nothing to sneeze at, and although Gershom would certainly be distressed about anything particularly brutal happening outside his door, well, all the more opportunity for Salvador to reassure him that he'll keep him safe.]

[spelleton]

Generally, if someone refuses to open their door to you, I think you're no longer allowed to call them your love. Or any variation of that.

[ He finishes putting on his gloves. Fiddles with them. He's just watching, and waiting. ]

[accidentallich]

Lover's quarrel. Nothing our love can't overcome.

[They're meant to be, so anything that stands in the way of that is only a minor obstacle.

His move, is it? Well, Salvador is nothing if not confident, and he'd like to get this nuisance out of the way so he can turn his attention to Kuni again. Which is why he opens with a tiny gesture, a flick of the wrist, and a blast of magical fire to the face.]

[spelleton]

[ It would be a nuisance if a fire started outside Gershom's apartment, but he doesn't want to get scorched, either. He opts to extinguish it with a spell of his own, instead.

Rather than use magic for countering, he decides to gamble on the assumption that Salvador, like many liches, has very little physical ability to speak of. So, he flips a knife into his hand and lunges, aiming to punch Salvador in the jaw with the hilt of the weapon, to add some extra weight. ]

[accidentallich]

[Physical labor is for people who can't pay other people to do it for them. Of course he doesn't have much ability, and he takes that hit to the jaw painfully hard and staggers backward.

But it's not enough to keep him from casting again, and this time the bolt of lightning is from point-blank range. Better be really quick on the extinguishing it this time.]

[spelleton]

[ He takes the hit. He's had worse, and pure magic is easier to deal with than some of the more physical things he's encountered. It's painful, of course, but it's not strong enough to throw him off. ]

[ He takes advantage of that stagger to lunge forward again and deliver another blow, aiming to get him either on the floor or against the wall. His expression is blank and focused, and he doesn't bother talking. ]

[accidentallich]

[Ekkehardt successfully kabedons Salvador.

Salvador, pinned and well aware now that he won't physically shake Ekkehardt off, spits in his face.]